Impacts of Social Media on Relationship Satisfaction

by Jasmine Mauss, LCMFT
Friday, March 28th, 2025
Facebook, Instagram, and TikTok have been some of largest growing platforms for connection and community over the last two decades. It is no question that the rising emergence of social media has shaped nearly every aspect of how we live our lives. Day in and day out, we are endlessly bombarded with new information: the latest beauty trends, recipes for avocado toast, or a complete stranger’s gender reveal. At the touch of our own fingertips, we are able to peer into the window of other people’s lives almost instantly. What we may not realize, is that this constant input of information can take a devastating toll on the perception of our own success and the contentment we feel in our relationships. Specifically, when it comes to our romantic relationships, we have a tendency to compare, covet, and compete with the people we see online. This can result in a projection of newfound and highly unrealistic expectations onto our partners. As these influences become more rampant, we are seeing an alarming decline in relationship satisfaction between couples. How do we intervene? Below, we discuss a few ways that we can protect our relationships from the pitfalls of social media influence and become grounded back into a space of practicality and peace within our partnerships.
1.Don’t Fall for the Fantasy – The challenging thing about peering into people’s personal lives is that we have no idea what is real and what is not. We are often heavily misguided by the forced smiles, elaborate gift giving, and monthly couple getaways to the tropics. We mistake these images as being the norm and extend these same standards to our relationship. “Why aren’t WE doing those things?” We start imagining all the ways our relationship could and should be. But who is actually deciding that for us? Step one is understanding that the fabrications we see online are not representative of typical relationships. Most couples are not doing the things we see online with the same cadence, extravagance, and excitement that we are witnessing on the web. When you feel feelings of envy or negativity come up, take a moment to pause and challenge yourself. Can you course-correct yourself to notice the performance behind the screen?
2. Re-Examine Your Expectations – Chronic time online can result in a slow and subtle overtaking of our expectations and desires. We see curated and carefully crafted depictions of couples in love and their ‘perfect relationships’, causing us to create a carbon copy blueprint to place on our own relationships. Without realizing it, our goalpost of “needs” for our partner to meet grows farther and farther out, becoming less attainable and practical. This is a recipe for dissatisfaction and disappointment. Step two is reflection on reality. Take some time to think about your current relationship. What do you really need in your relationship with your partner? Before you started spending more time online, were you even unhappy in your relationship? Are your needs actually NEEDS, or did your desires become misconstrued and mislabeled? Are you extending enough compassion and grace to your partner, acknowledging their own limitations, stressors, and relationship requests?
3. Redirect Your Attention – The saying goes “Where attention goes, energy flows.” This statement is beyond accurate in the case of relationship satisfaction. If you are constantly thinking about what is NOT happening in your relationship, you will never notice what IS. Dedication to fixating on the deficit will not take you very far. In order to deeply appreciate our partners’ efforts, we have to force ourselves to notice where they are showing up for us in our daily life. Step three: Try taking a digital detox and paying more attention to specific moments where you feel joy and gratitude for your relationship. Reflect on some of the ways that the relationship supports your life goals and your daily functioning. When we can place our awareness on what is REAL and happening NOW, we can notice the consistent gifts that our partners and our relationships offer us in every moment.