Q: Welcome to the Relationship Counseling Center of Maryland (RCC), Wilson! We are excited to have you on staff as a therapist. What are you most excited for in working with us and our clients? 

A: Thanks for having me! I’m most excited to be working with such a strong team. The therapists here are all well-trained and very supportive. They offer many different perspectives when discussing cases that allow me to take a step back and re-analyze my approach.

Q: In your style of therapy, do you like to tackle the main issue head-on, or focus on the deeper issues first?

A: I focus on the deeper issues first. The main issue that brought the client to therapy is usually the tip of the iceberg of a more vulnerable issue. However, vulnerability is quite difficult for anyone to address, so I take my time slowly addressing themes around those deeper issues until the client feels comfortable enough to openly discuss their most vulnerable parts.

Q: Have you yourself been to therapy? 

A: Yes! Attending therapy has been one of the most rewarding and humbling experiences I’ve ever had. There is a lot of negative stigma around therapy that makes people think if you go, you’re admitting that you’re weak, or something is wrong with you. I think it is unrealistic for anyone to think that they have no weaknesses. Many people experience shame when asking for help, but it takes courage to advocate for yourself in that way. I think therapy provides a vehicle for people to identify their blind spots in a healthy way in order to grow as an individual. As a therapist, it makes me more mindful of my clients’ experiences and perspectives in the therapy room.

Q: What was the moment you realized you wanted to be a marriage and family therapist?

A: I knew I wanted to be a therapist when I was 16 years old after talking with a friend who was struggling with their parents’ divorce. I didn’t yet know, though, what kind of therapist I wanted to be. I considered Child Psychologist, Criminal Psychologist, and Social Worker before landing on Marriage and Family Therapist (MFT). I really appreciate the systemic approach a MFT takes in their work, which is what attracted me to that profession over the others.

Q: What do you like most about working with people? 

A: Everyone has a story. I’m not good at reading, but I still enjoy the adventure clients take me on with their story. I see myself as a co-editor of the story each client is writing. My goal is to help them construct their preferred narrative and finish their book. I’m also aware I don’t look like/act like a typical therapist. I’ve had many clients enter the room and say “You’re not what I expected a therapist to be like.” I think that really speaks more to the stigma that scares people away from therapy. I’m hoping in my work I am able to show people that our community isn’t one to be feared.

Q: Outside of being a therapist, what are some of your hobbies?

A: I really enjoy singing. I find it very therapeutic and enjoy attending karaoke events. I also play volleyball competitively about 3 days a week.

Q: What do you do for self-care?

A: While I see my hobbies as a large component of self-care, I also meet with some friends once a month for a game night where we engage in some fun board games. I also love food, and therefore love to cook. At one point, I was considering culinary arts school before pursuing a career in mental health. Cooking for one is okay, but there is no greater joy than cooking for friends.

Q: In your experience, what is the most important thing that can strengthen a relationship? 

A: Validating our partner. Hands down. Everyone wants to be heard, but nobody wants to listen. It is so easy for us to ignore our partner when they are expressing themselves because we are focused on waiting for them to finish so we can get our point across. Being able to understand our partner’s experience is valuable in order to have our own subjective experience understood. It’s not about agreeing or disagreeing. It’s simply acknowledging that your partner feels a certain way, and that they are allowed to feel that way.