by Meg Tenny, LCMFT
Why is it important to take the time to get in touch with your feelings? Feelings are a powerful force – they will make themselves known one way or another. Often, emotions surface psychosomatically – through your body – if you don’t give voice to them. Negative emotions that are suppressed can resurface as back aches, headaches or migraines, loss of sleep, and gastrointestinal issues, or through mental health problems like depression and anxiety. Processing feelings can prevent an unhealthy emotional build-up. Avoiding emotional build-up can help you head off physical and emotional problems, and improve overall well-being. Here are some simple ways to start getting in touch with your emotions:
1. Breathe: Breathe in while counting to five, then hold your breath for three counts. Breathe out through your mouth while counting to five and hold your breath again for three counts. This centers you and your attention on your true core of feelings. It also makes the thoughts knocking around in your head quiet and still long enough to focus on what really matters – the underlying feelings.
2. Give Yourself Permission to Feel: Give yourself permission to feel anything that comes up without judging it. You can ask yourself, “What am I feeling at this moment?” Sit with uncomfortable feelings for a few minutes and just acknowledge them. Then explore why you feel this way without resorting to self-blame or the blaming of others. While your emotions may not feel rational to you, accept them as valid.
3. Write: Write your feelings down. Research shows that spending 15-20 minutes journaling for several days in a row improves your capacity to identify your emotions, work through your feelings, and improve your mood. It can also help you sort through your feelings before talking to loved ones, so that you can ask for what you need without blaming and strengthen your relationships in a healthy way.
